The Critters are Taking Over

Literally…The critters are taking over. In the past week, a series of critters have invaded my space. While my farming background makes me no stranger to animals, my current visitors are leaving something to be desired.

The Chipmunk. By far, the chipmunk is the cutest of the critters. I first noticed the little munk Sunday morning on my patio. I opened the blinds on the back door to see if the sun had hit the patio table yet (I like to eat breakfast on the patio if the sun isn’t completely up yet), and there was the munk. I cannot recall ever being that close to a munk, so I decided to observe in the hope that I might learn something about munk behavior. After some investigation of my patio and light frolicking, the munk jumped into my strawberries. Given my lack of experience with munks, I found this feat quite impressive – the jump was over a foot. However, what happened next changed my view of the munk from once of appreciation to one of disdain. Munk proceeded to take a bite out of every ripe strawberry save one! I did not appreciate this, and as a result scared the offensive munk away from my patio. So much for my homegrown strawberries!

The Rabbits. The rabbits rank just below the chipmunk in cuteness, but they rank lowest in annoyance – kudos to them. I don’t really have an issue with the rabbits, yet. During my morning walks/runs the past two weeks, I have noticed several rabbits seem to have moved into the neighborhood. I’m fine with this as they are better neighbors than some of the humans in the neighborhood, but as with the munk, I was a little surprised to see them in so urban a setting. The rabbits watch me, and I watch them. Thus far, they have yet to find my plants, so I simply enjoy them. However, I am concerned that I will awake one morning to discover my plants destroyed.

The Spider. The spider is another matter. Now, I happen to like spiders. They are some of the most useful creatures God ever invented because they eat the unwanted bugs. My problem with the spider is location, location, location. The spider has decided to build a web across my back door. When I arrived home from school yesterday, the mail had yet to run, and I forgot about it until around 10 pm. When I remembered I needed to check my mail, I opened the back door and walked outside – right into the spider’s web. If you have ever had the misfortune to become entangled in such a web, you are well aware that it takes a massive effort to disentangle oneself from a spider’s web. Bad spider.

The Flies. The flies are at the pinnacle of my annoyance. Over the weekend, five flies infiltrated my residence. Three have now passed, but two remain are working round-the-clock to vex me. These two flies are the craftiest flies I have ever beheld. They appear to have the ability to sense when I am approaching with an instrument of death and immediately take to the skies. Further, they have taken to using me as their landing pad when I am seated on my loveseat. This is quite inappropriate! I do not believe I should be forced to tolerate this behavior in my own home. They were not invited and should therefore be expunged. My message to the flies…BEWARE: Death is imminent.